stress

Stress is not a word that should even be associated with summer! Happily drifting along in our post restaurant haze, I have finally hit that moment where everything slows down from life to work and now as I need to keep the momentum going I am stuck. This is causing me stress. The kind of stress that makes me take big gulps of air just to make sure I can still breathe. This stress is suffocating me like the deep southern heat in the summertime. A constant reminder that things aren't just so. This is the dangerous kind that can lead to slight or even deep depression on my part. Being it summer, I am trying to drag myself out of this worry vortex by drenching myself in the pool with my son. Unable to make myself exercise this will have to do. Social commitments are not big on my list right now. I am happy to hide away at home or said pool and try not to talk to anyone. It is actually this kind of mind frame that started me on this writing venture so I suppose there ARE up sides. My stress and worry are of course the usual suspects. Store, financial obligations, nothing new. I don't do well when things slow down or as I stated before, get stuck. I feel perpetually bogged down in this quagmire I have created. This leads to panic. I have been in this situation many times before and God knows I should remember that everything always works out one way or the other, but it always feels like a long time coming. Slowly slogging through the last 2 weeks has made me as nervous as a cat on water. I am snappy or some may say bitchy depending on the perspective. I start to feel that sensation to flee my life and leave the worry behind, but that doesn't jive, I'd be lost without my little family. Besides, I already tried that tactic last year and my husband wasn't buying it. Really, I thought buying the vintage RV and selling fish tacos on some beach was a good idea.  The only solution to what ails me is to just hunker down, suck it up and keep working. Work heals the soul, makes you forget just what was so bad in the first place. I promise myself I will not let this stress best me. I am self-soothing by baking fresh blueberry muffins, eating homemade pizza, and waking at the crack of dawn for yet another estate sale adventure with my favorite bitch. If this doesn't work, I might just be having that traveling fish taco conversation with hubby again. Charlie, see you in the morn! Goodnight world.