vacation blues

Hello! Fresh off a fabulous vacation, I came home to a slurry of new worries and of course the big one REALITY! I am not one to sit and write about my troubles or anything for that matter, but my husband has had enough of my complaining the past 24 hours to last a lifetime. He has his own concerns for his future and how we continue to keep our house, business, cars, etc. So in the meantime I figured it would be therapeutic and hopefully amusing as well to write on about how to stay sane and not end up in rehab during these troublesome times. I will need to take a break to refresh my brain w/ a tropical concoction and dream of that sandy beach and ocean breeze that now has me in the doldrums considering I am back home in my lovely gray city.
So here I sit facing this computer screen and hoping it will knock these BROKEdown blues right out of me or I might just have to make another cocktail. Let me just hit you up w/some background. I own my own business and work as a waitress part time. My business is a wonderful little vintage home decor boutique. The past 2 weekends had big events scheduled where I was banking on making, well, bank. Not to be. It would just so happen that stupid stock market had to lose all it had gained and therefore my scheduled earning were not up to par, ugh, now how do I pay my damn rent and that gas bill that NEVER goes away?!! Grovel. Call the landlord(for the 3rd time)don't cash that check! So sick of doing that. Anyway after a lot of crying and soul searching(I take my business way too personally, hey what do you want, I'm a Leo!) I decided to just chalk it up, keep doing what I do, and now I write. The other part of this equation would be my husband's endless job search, for trying to be a teacher in a society where everyone now hates teachers is rough. So there he cooks in a hot kitchen and works for health insurance and little else. Now do you see my frustration?!
Anyway, I know my troubles pale in comparison to others, but when you are trying to just make a damn decent existence and have to wonder when your income will come flowing in(it's trickeling at this moment) you tend to panic and perceive your troubles as the ONLY troubles in these times. Please excuse my selfishness, but seeing that I'm not trying to save the world just my family, I hope you understand. On that note I will sign off for the evening and save more of my story for tomorrow. We haven't even gotten to the taking your kid to work chat. Until then, good night world.