forever young

I don't like getting older. Really, what woman does? How many women do you know that actually say "woohoo, I love my gray hair" or " these age lines really DO give me character". The Hell with that. I don't like my age lines especially the well-grooved two between my eyebrows. Oh sure they give them a fun little nickname, "the elevens". Who thought that up? Just dumb. Well my "elevens" just make me look like I'm mad at the world. Don't even get me started on sun damage. My mother always warned me to wear sun block and watch my face. Well mom, it's there and I love the sun and I love the water and I don't see that changing so I guess I move to the spf 50 this summer. I'll be protected like a red head at high noon. I've written about age before and how I refuse to let it affect me, but as you can see, it didn't work. Age affects you. It affects you every time you visit a doctor and hold your breath because you never had to worry about the scary stuff before. Watching your doctor clam up after seeing "something" on a computer screen, well that pretty much terrifies me. I don't like these forties. Sure I'm wiser, that's a given. You just know more as you get older. You know that the world will always need saving and there are bad people who do bad things to others, but somehow you manage to not let every single plight affect how you live your life. You know that trends come and go and everything repeats itself and each generation that repeats these trends thinks they're the first to do so. Life is funny. We all think we are so unique and different from everyone else when actually we're all the same. Yep, we may look different, act different, smell different, but we are all just human and that makes us all the same. We are born, we live, and we die. How we live is what matters. Throw that age number to the wind and just be yourself. I am 43. I don't feel 43. So what if I was probably the oldest person at Friday night skate. I can still race around the rink as well as the tweens, maybe better. So what if I spent an afternoon watching young angsty vampire movies. I like vampires. Always have, since I was in sixth grade. Only my vampire knowledge started with Catherine Deneuve and David Bowie in The Hunger, way before Anne Rice and Stephanie Meyer. Although I do have to say every time Twilight movies are on the world stops and I am rapt with attention and my husband rolls his eyes at me. "Sled boarding" down a homemade snow ramp is not something responsible adults do, but it sure was fun and my child loved seeing mama be an idiot. Signing up for SnapChat so I can make dumb videos with my twenty-something friends is just fun. My husband and I have spent most of our lives working with people half our age and for this I am thankful. It has helped us stay young at heart. It helps when middle-age life starts creeping in and the bills pile up and job concerns keep my eyes glued to the ceiling at night. It helps to know I can tie on my old roller skates from seventh grade and glide across that polished wood floor without a care in the world. As Alphaville proclaimed in the eighties, "Let us die young or let us live forever. We don't have the power but we never say never. Sitting in a sand pit, life is a short trip....forever young, I want to be...Goodnight world.